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chapter 56
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A LONG TERM RELATIONSHIP SUITS OUR FEMININE SOUL
"A woman who loves herself is a woman who will not settle for just any man. A woman who loves herself is a woman who waits patiently for her beloved to turn up."
Nowadays, women can sustain a comfortable physical life for themselves without a man. We are able to earn good money in what we do, treat ourselves to a nice house and jet off to exotic locations on our own. As portrayed in Sex and the City, women are quite capable of having a good time with their girlfriends, having sex with men whenever it suits them, and even having children without needing a man in the house. It seems we can date any man we fancy, chuck him out when he doesnt meet our high standards, find a new one and start all over again. It seems things for women have never been better. We seem to have it all. Or at least on the physical level. But on an emotional level, it's a disaster. Women have never felt more alone and unloved in their lives. Men seem to be confused about what we want from them. The path to eternal happiness seems to have veered off unnoticed while we were busy fighting for equality and competing with them.
The evidence that this particular path is not working too well for us is clear. Frustrating and unsatisfying short-term relationships are like acid
to our parched, feminine heart. For those of us who are ready to be deeply loved by a man we trust, ready to be seen in our naked radiance by a man we don't have to impress, it is time for us to try a different path. It is time for us to stop kidding ourselves and see that having short-term relationships does not serve our feminine soul at all. We are cosmically programmed to love forever, to abandon heart and soul to our one true love. Because Love is our nature, all our cells scream to live and die in love, and anything less is a life of torture. If you are single and you profess to not feeling this yearning desire to drown in love, it could be because you are still reeling from a wound that has yet to heal. Your 'I'm happy being single forever' attitude might be a defence against the fear of further pain. You have been badly hurt by a man (it doesn't have to be a lover, it could be a father figure) and you are too terrified to trust a man and expose yourself to vulnerability again.
It is vital for us to see that short-term relationships actually drain our feminine essence. Every time a different man comes and goes, our heart bleeds a little. So having bouts of brief encounters is like being bled alive. Eventually our anaemic heart begins to doubt love itself. We begin
to form beliefs that say things like, love hurts, relationships are so complicated and difficult or I'll never meet the right man. These beliefs can make us give up on love altogether.
Having short-term relationships also weakens us because every time a man leaves, we feel a little less glorious. We feel as if there is something wrong with us because we haven't managed to find love. And if he doesn't call back when he says he will, we wonder whether we are good enough. Our self-esteem and self-confidence get knocked, and we question if we are desirable. Every time we date a man who is not compatible, we have a little less faith in men. We begin to have a clouded view about the goodness of men, and we let go of the fact that we can be so good for each other.
When we have been hurt a few times, we may choose to stay single as a form of defence. We may even convince ourselves that we don't need a man in our life to be happy. No need for an intimate love in our life? Who are we kidding? We all know that no story is a great story without the dramas of love in it. That's why most women would rather watch a chick flick than a war film. The triumph of human spirit does touch our heart, but nothing overcomes our feminine soul more than the requited love between a man and a woman. Take the love story out of Titanic and the movie would not be half as emotionally compelling as it is. Deep down we need our love story to burn brightly in our feminine soul. The Love-being that we are feeds from this inner fire. And only a long-term relationship that is based on trust, Love and joy can ignite this fire.
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Audio book 'JuicyWoman - A Spiritual Guide to Your Feminine Radiance'
- available October 2010
No time to read? This fantastic life-changing book for women will now be available on CD so you don't miss out on the useful gems in the book just because you're too busy to read.
An ideal present for yourself or your girlfriends.
You can place your order now and get it hot off the press!
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